I always thought of blogs as being narcissistic, business related, or as my sister's, a way of keeping in touch or memorializing.

But, by necessity, I am learning a lot about myself. I find I need to get my thoughts out, and it helps me to know that someone else will read them. So I have created this little space for myself, to express the things I have trouble saying (be it emotional or physical trouble), to share what I'm going through, and what I'm learning through it.

I absolutely welcome comments. It's nice to know how people relate to what I'm saying.
To send me a private message, please e-mail me: flylittlewordsfly@gmail.com
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Sunday, 30 September 2012

Another September

One of the super cool things about having this blog, is that I can go back and remind myself of how far I've come on this journey of mine.

Last year, on the eve of Rosh Hashana, I wrote:

"I have a feeling this coming year will be different. I think that while this will all continue, I will find my way through it, and reach a place of wholeness and clarity that will envelop the paradoxes and cradle them, much like the yin-yang."

I think that was rather prescient of me... I still have a ways to go, but I am getting more and more comfortable with paradoxes and have a much greater capacity for stillness and quiet than I did before, and I am getting comfortable now with fewer labels and absolutes, with uncertainty and unpredictability.

Friday, 21 September 2012

Energy Reserves

We have word, and the word is good.

I am now at the phase in my healing where I am starting to build a healthy energy reserve! This is so super exciting, that I need to really be very careful what I do with that excitement.

When my Osteopath finished her treatment yesterday, she turned and said "Now we need to have that talk we have to have when people start really healing." The talk consisted of her explaining how the energy reserve works, how to cultivate it, and to not under any circumstance for any reason try to start anything new for at least 12 weeks.

So I am taking from now until 2013 as an extended break. I am determined to focus on integrating all the psycho-emotional and spiritual growth I've experienced over the last two years, to ensure that should I regain prior levels of energy, stamina and ability, I will continue on the path I have begun.

Tuesday, 11 September 2012

Identity Breaking

My Osteopath is back! I am a happy happy girl. First thing after catching up, was treatment to help my body integrate the immune-boosting-bug-killing pills I'm taking.

I am glad to report that I am no longer feeling ill effects from the Transfer Factor, and that one pill every three days seems to be working very nicely for me. Apparently, not having immediate ill effects, however, does not mean my body is actually responding as well as it could... thus the jagged ups and downs, and the extreme reaction to air pressure drops, and other such variable reactions to various stimuli. I can honestly say that I am feeling remarkably better this weekend.

What I am now processing is the idea that I would be very well served, especially in my healing, by not attaching myself - boxing myself in, if you will - by creating and re-creating identities and identifiers for myself.