I always thought of blogs as being narcissistic, business related, or as my sister's, a way of keeping in touch or memorializing.

But, by necessity, I am learning a lot about myself. I find I need to get my thoughts out, and it helps me to know that someone else will read them. So I have created this little space for myself, to express the things I have trouble saying (be it emotional or physical trouble), to share what I'm going through, and what I'm learning through it.

I absolutely welcome comments. It's nice to know how people relate to what I'm saying.
To send me a private message, please e-mail me: flylittlewordsfly@gmail.com
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Saturday, 24 November 2012

Quieting my Overactive Brain by Shifting Attention, and the End of My Insomnia

It is interesting to me that the post I wrote about insomnia back in February is one of the most-read pages in my entire blog. There seem to be an awful lot of people looking for solutions to insomnia related to illness and/or overactive brains. Insomnia, true insomnia, is devastating (Fight Club wasn't all that far off!). I want to thank the reader who e-mailed me privately to tell me how she thought she was alone in this; you inspired me to come back and share my answer to you with the rest of the world. And then some :)  Because in thinking about what I wrote you, I realize that finding a sleep solution was very much tied in to how I distract my brain, and how different that is from truly quieting it. I am hoping to find a more permanent, quiet-based sleep solution that requires no distraction in the long run. In the meantime, though, I'll do what it takes to get the sleep I need!

I did find a solution that works for me, for now, and since there seem to be so many people looking, I will share it, even though I don't believe there is a one-size fits all.

First, I followed all the standard Sleep Hygiene rules - I'm sure if you've been struggling with insomnia, you know all about these. The most impactful of these for me was leaving my laptop downstairs when I went to bed. None of that was enough for me, though, because every time I turned out the light and lay down my brain started up again. So I threw out one of those rules, and got out my book again. Here's how I got back to sleep:

Monday, 12 November 2012

Universality and Uniqueness

Sycnhronicity is amazing. There was a lesson I needed, and the universe conspired to put certain people and things in my vicinity so that I could see it, should I choose to. You know I choose to.

So here it is. We are Universal and we are Unique - yet another paradox to ponder. The common threads, the big picture - when you look at life like that, you can see it - when you live openly, it is there. This is my story: I was born whole. I was broken. I hit rock bottom. I remembered who I was. I chose to be that, and I evolved. Life had ups, and downs. I continue to evolve.

It's a simple story. And common. And yet, the details of it are unique to me. Where and when I was born, my familial heritage, my teachers, my influences are only mine. My DNA is unique, my fingerprints, my physical being - there is only one like me. Even my sister and I remember our childhoods and the adults that shaped them very differently, and we were very close, in age, and emotionally. The reasons I broke, how I hit rock bottom, how I came to remember and the ways in which I evolved are all in detail only things that I could have experienced. My thoughts are my own, born of each individual experience on this planet. Mine and only mine. Nobody can ever share my unique perspective. And yet. My story is universal.

Monday, 5 November 2012


Remember remember the 5th of November. Nothing lasts forever even cold November rain.

Yep, it's November. And that scares me. Looking back at the last few years, my biggest crashes (including the onset) have all started in November. Why is that?

Cold season? Yeah, I have caught another cold.

Aftermath of Hallowe'en? Could be - we all know I go a little cuckoo for the holiday - but I was careful this year. Although even after all the care I took, even sitting on the floor by the candy so as not to have to get up or lean over too far, my house somehow ended up as the great reunion spot for my boy, his cousins and best friend, and the assorted parents and grandparents that followed them.